When it gets to be springtime in Minneapolis, you can count on one thing for certain--being pissed off. Ridiculously rapid weather-pattern changes, lightning, thunder, snow, heat, tornadoes... you literally never know what they hell to expect. It's 75 and sunny at 4pm on a Thursday, and by Saturday you can be staring down the barrel of an 8" snowstorm. Fuck me.
March 31st, 2008 was a perfect example of why we should all hate Minnesota weather. It was the Twins home opener at the Dome, and had they been playing outdoors the 7" of snow would have put a real damper on the first game of the '08 campaign. Within the week, I'm pretty sure it got to be like 85 degrees before temps retreated to a normal range. Tonight, after a stretch of stable-but-shitty weather, we are experiencing yet more snow.
Just when we think its safe--BAM: A cosmic dick-in-the-eye. You have a softball game tonight? Thunderstorm. Block party next week? Freezing rain turning to snow. Hoping to see some girls show off a little skin in the next couple weeks of class? Well forget that, buddy, 'cause we're looking at a late-April cold snap.
Mother Nature, the skank, has decided that we, in the Midwest, deserve a constant mix of springtime ups and downs. Cold and snowy on Monday? Well its gonna be hot and muddy on Tuesday, bitch!
Minnesota to Mother Nature... we hate you. Stop fucking with us already. I doubt I can take it much longer, and I really don't want to have to move anytime too soon. How much more can I take, though? (Sigh) I don't think a whole lot.
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